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Health & Fitness

College Application Essays - Avoid the Stress

DON’T BE NEGATIVE:

Word Choice is extremely important. The following “sound-bytes” come from a first draft. The girl is writing about being a Muslim in a Post- 9/11 world. Notice the language.

•      “Faced the same abuse…”

•      “Soiled Muslim image…”

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•      “Erase the grime…”

•      “When others realized that I was human…I acknowledged it as well.”

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•      “Forced to go through the motions of being a Muslim…”

•      “Face the realities of the world…”

•      “A religion with a tarnished image…”

•      “Ease the burden of future generations…”

Same essay….nothing in the content was lost. Notice the word choice now.

•      “A sense of self-respect and pride…”

•      “Love and kindness...family…Muslim community…”

•      “Perceptions can be changed with honesty, patience and education…”

•      “Misguided information…”

•      “Erase the stigma…”

•      “Defuse myths and assumptions with a smile and understanding demeanor…”

•      “Supportive friends from all backgrounds who believe…in tolerance.”

•       “I aspire to further promote the positive reality…and acceptance…”

Quick English Lesson:

Denotation: The dictionary definition of a word

Connotation: The emotional response a word produces.

Group and Mob have basically the same dictionary definition. However…..think about the connotations produced by the following examples…

“Mom. There’s a group of teens outside our house. I’m going to say hello.”

“Mom. There’s a mob of teens outside our house. I’m going to say hello.”

No problem with the group…but if you hear mob….you’re dialing 911.

Word Choice is important.        Being POSITIVE is crucial.

As it turns out…today I was working on a student’s essay and had to address this very point. One of the supplemental essays asks how you have been influenced by your community. This student…who I might add is absolutely brilliant wrote that his town influenced him to leave because the town is so *homogeneous and void of culture and diversity (My words not his)  that he needed to go other places to experience the world. Don’t worry…I slapped some common sense into this future rocket scientist.

BE POSITIVE

*By the way…before an idiot writes a nasty retort….homogeneous has nothing to do with sexual preferences.

I will be presenting a FREE workshop on the Top Five Mistakes Students Make on their College Application Essays at each of the following libraries. (Pre-registration is strongly advised. Please call the library if you wish to attend) I am also available to speak at PTA meetings, JCC, etc....

This is my complete list as of now….NY, NJ, and CT.

Sept 9 –   Shelter Rock Library (NY)

Sept 12 – West Windsor North HS PTA (NJ)

Sept 16 -  Syosset Library  (NY)

Sept 17 – Mount Pleasant Library (NY)

Sept 18 – Manhasset Library  (NY)

Sept 23 – Bellmore Library (NY)

Sept 24 – Jericho Library (NY)

Sept 25 – Montvale Library (NJ)

Sept 26 – Avon Library (CT)

Sept 30 – Smithtown Library (NY)

Oct 2 – Warren Library (NJ)

Oct 3 –   Oceanside Library  (NY)

Oct 6 –  National College Fair (Nassau Coliseum) 

Oct 7 – Maplewood Library (NJ)

Oct 8 – Academy of Allied Health Sciences HS PTA (NJ)

Oct 9 –   My 55th BD….I’ll be under the bed, curled in the fetal position, crying.

Oct 10 – Leonia Library (NJ)

Oct 17 – Sea Cliff Library (NY)

 Randy Levin is the ONLY college application essay expert asked to speak at the National College Fair- Nassau Coliseum – Oct 6th 2013. The vast majority of Randy’s clients are accepted to the Ivy League or other prestigious colleges. He has a MA in English and a MFA in Creative Writing. He is a published writer and was a high school English teacher in high achieving north shore Long Island school districts for close to ten years.  For FREE information, go to his website: WriteToCollege.com 
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